Paradoxical Intention

by Balue

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1.
There's something in the stillness And in everything that moves There's something in between us Thats connecting me to you So if I focus all my energy On these things I can't control It suddenly becomes so clear to me Then I laugh and let them go P A R A D O X I C A L I N T E N T I O N I've been living in the library I want to see if there's anybody like me I've stumbling through the pages of old I've been learning new things I was never told I've been drifting all around the globe I've been meeting people feeling my heart start to grow I've been looking myself in the eyes I've been thinking real hard about WHO, WHAT, & WHY? P A R A D O X I C A L I N T E N T I O N
2.
Youth Waves 04:27
Youth I don't know what you are anymore Youth I don't know what comes next or what's in store Youth I just hope that you'll meet me down on the shore Youth that was the place that you and I did adore The waves are like opiates Like ultimate pleasure They hit my face like opiates If I open it, what a treasure Youth its so nice to see you again Youth its so nice to be with you my friend Youth its so nice to hug you tight Youth its so nice to see you in my eyes Youth I lost you... Youth I found you... The waves are like opiates Like ultimate pleasure They hit my face like opiates If I open it, what a treasure I don't ever want to grow up I don't want to give up my drugs Like movies, and music and traveling gets hard man The waves are like opiates Like ultimate pleasure They hit my face like opiates If I open it what a treasure
3.
Naked 03:29
I want to be the only naked person in the room I do I want to be completely exposed on the operating table I do Cuz I'm the only man in the world who has, has a body like this And I'm the only man in the world who has, has a heart like this You ought to be the only naked person in the room Wont you? You ought to be completely exposed on your mother's kitchen table Wont you? Cuz you're the only person in the world who has, has a body like that And you're the only person in the world who has, has a heart like that Don't lose your humanity Don't take yourself so seriously Empty Heroics and Low Comedy... We are just creatures in a world that needs, needs to learn how to have fun Its True...
4.
Protector 03:49
Joy is the only feeling that I will accept And yours is the only smile that makes my heart melt So lock me up inside the cage of your ribs And never, never let me go again I know that probably sounds a little crazy but baby, baby your heart needs protecting... I'm the protector of your heart Pain is one of many of the monsters that i will deflect Cuz' your tears are the only things that make me feel upset And I'll collect those tears in mason jars And use them to wash and scrub your heart I know that probably sounds a little crazy But baby, baby your heart needs refreshing... I'm the protector of your heart Baby those monsters are smart... Don't worry I'm guarding your heart...
5.
Scaly Eyes 03:26
Oh young man swim to the light Oh young man gotta put up a fight ooh la la la lullaby Oh Young man get back on the trail Oh young man quit casting those spells Ooh la la la lullaby You're alive, don't take that lightly You're alive, stop trying to fight me Oh young man you got a second chance Oh young man turn your dreams into plans Ooh la la la lullaby Oh young man pull the scales off of your eyes Oh young man gotta go start living life You're alive, don't take that lightly You're alive, stop trying to fight me Ooh la la la lullaby
6.
It takes a special kind of man to be truly lazy If you know what I'm saying the we've got the same vibes What people don't understand about us that are truly lazy Is that we're always really busy Our Minds are always working The cogs are turning The coal is burning So what if we aint got nothing to show for it? I can't make up my mind I like different things all the time But I'm just relaxing and taking it all in I don't see the point in worrying, whatever happens, happens I'm just relaxing and taking it all in Our Minds are always working The cogs are turning The coal is burning So what if we aint got nothing to show for it? Yeah I'm lazy, whatever Don't judge me, whatever Our Minds are always working The cogs are turning The coal is burning So what if we aint got nothing to show for it?
7.
Pool Honeys 04:29
Wendy Peffercorn I loved you, so mature Was always kissing the TV screen Was always wishing I was living a dream Going to the pool, seeing the Pool Honeys Even if the sun tries to burn my skin My insides would still be raw Even if the moon tries to harm the sun My precious eyes could still burn out Going to the pool, seeing the Pool Honeys I want a summer that I can believe in I want a summer that aint got no rhyme or reason I want a summer that knocks me down and gets me bleeding I want a summer that I will remember when I’m dying... Even if the sun tries to burn my skin My insides would still be raw Even if the moon tries to harm the sun My precious eyes could still burn out Going to the pool, seeing the Pool Honeys
8.
Fancy Things 04:00
Fancy things appeal to me but I know they don’t last The simple life is so real to me but its all moving to fast Oh I wish I was a river steady and on the move Oh I wish I was a river slowly drifting towards the truth But I’m just a human trapped in social norms And I’m just a human drifting to conform If all our wishes were horses you know them beggars would ride If all our dreams came true then last night I would have died Still I wish I was a river steady and on the move Still I wish I was a river slowly drifting towards the truth But I’m just a human trapped in social norms And I’m just a human drifting to conform I don’t think its fair to judge anybody like me I’m only saying this because I don’t know what I believe How can I make serious point? I’m wishy washy. I don’t think its fair to judge anybody like me Cuz I’m just a human trapped in social norms And I’m just a human drifting to conform And I wish I was a river, steady and on the move And I wish I was a river slowly drifting towards the truth
9.
Richard 04:42
I miss my little brother I missy the joy you bring You are the funny parts In all my favorite movies And dude I don’t judge You know I’ve been there too Drowning in the emptiness Thats deep inside of you I know it’s scary when you feel the waves crash down Flooding your brain with thoughts But if you paddle and wade through he waters You’re gonna find what you lost And float back home... Sometimes the truth hurts But I’m digging in this dirt And I don’t care about your past I just want your life to last And dude I don’t judge You know I’ve been there too Holding on to the nothingness Thats surrounding you I know it’s scary when you feel the waves crash down Flooding your brain with thoughts But if you paddle and wade through he waters You’re gonna find what you lost And float back home...
10.
The sky is bright but my outlook is dark I’ve got cold hands but I’ve got a warm heart The water is clear it’s calling my name I’ll dive right in and forget everything Splish Splash, All day I don’t care, I’m here to stay My mind feels light the water is soothing My body’s alright, man that aint no fooling I’ll disappear in the ocean around me Its all so clear, when I just float and be... Splish Splash, All day I don’t care, I’m here to stay My outlook turned T R O P I C A L... Splish Splash, All day I don’t care, I’m here to stay
11.
Balloons 03:24
Accept the pieces of the puzzle Thats the first step to truth We become what we think we are I never thought I’d be like you Oh but I’m like the balloons Floating high without a clue My mind is up in the clouds And it aint never coming down But my body is glued to the couch And my eyes are looking out for you I think I understand now Does that make me a man now? I still don’t want to grow up I don’t think I’ll ever give it up My mind is always changing My thoughts are rearranging I treat life like a candy bowl I take and take till its gone Oh but I’m like the balloons Floating high without a clue My mind is up in the clouds And it aint never coming down But my body is glued to the couch And my eyes are looking out for you I’m like a balloon Floating high without a clue My mind is in the clouds It aint never coming down My body is glued to the couch My eyes are looking out for you
12.
STDT 04:18
(Same Thought Different Tune) [end] I want a summer that I can believe in I want a summer that aint got no rhyme or reason The sun may burn my skin But my insides will still be raw I want a summer that I can believe in I want a summer that aint got no rhyme or reason I want a summer that hits me hard and gets my heart beating I want a summer that I will remember when I’m old and dying The sun may burn my skin But my insides will still be raw Even thought the sun will burn my skin My insides will still bee raw I want a summer that I can believe in I want a summer that aint got no rhyme or reason The sun may burn my skin But my insides will still be raw
13.

about

Paradoxical Intention is the deliberate practice of a neurotic habit or thought, undertaken in order to identify and remove it.

Written/Recorded during the summer of 2012 in the Land of Enchantment.
This is headphone music...

credits

released September 6, 2012

All music written and recorded by eli thomas.
(except) "Tarzan Boy" Originally by Baltimora.
Some Lyrics on "Protector" taken from a poem by Dan Randlemon.
Track 1, "Bishop Fulton Sheen"
Track 12, Lopez - Morallis "Carl Jung"

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Balue New Mexico

[Headphone Music]

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